Are you where you want to be?
Hey y’all! How did your first week of January treat ya?
The last month or so I’ve been feeling really disconnected from self and almost burnt out so I’ve been intentional about prioritizing self-care, rest, spirituality and healing and it feels so good - it’s been long overdue.
I’ve been waking up earlier, having the first hour to myself to journal, drink tea, meditate, and read.
going to Sauna House (I’m obsessed with this place)
getting back on my gym routine (3-4x a week)
going to a gentle yoga class
taking myself on a mal date (shopping, dinner, flowers)
reading before bed (I’m reading The Power of Now and it’s incredible! Highly recommend)
I’m already feeling a shift in my energy and presence - like being in the present moment as much as possible…so if you’ve been feeling the same way maybe getting back to the basics will help you too!
Speaking of present moment… Let’s get into what this blog post is all about
Are you where you want to be?
I’m talking Literally. Physically. Emotionally. Spiritually. Mentally. even Energetically?
I’m talking the outer layer (your career, your lifestyle, your finances, your relationships, your health) AND also the inner layer (your mindset, your values, beliefs, your why).
So… are you where you want to be?
If you are - hell yes honey! I have no doubt that you’ve put in the consistent work, pushed yourself past your comfort zone, and put faith in yourself.
but maybe you're like the majority of us and feel like you’re close to the right path but are still finding your way… or you’re completely lost and need a map.
My hope is by the end of this blog post you….
*know that you’re not alone, especially if you aren’t where you thought you’d be in your life journey
*feel encouraged to reconnect with your dreams and see how far you can really take it. Or, if you aren’t sure of where you want to be yet, you..
*are empowered to explore what “where you want to be” looks like… something that gets you inspired, excited, and feels like a true extension of your self expression.
*are able to overcome the most common challenges of showing up for yourself and going after something that’s significant to you…
*feel inspired to make epic changes in your life and know you have a cheerleader on your side (aka me)
*want to meet yourself where you are, even if you’re not exactly where you want to be and can find gratitude for where you’re at
Are you where you want to be?
(1) First things first - life is a journey and can often be a cycle. Some seasons we feel like we’re in a rut and have no freakin clue wtf we’re doing, then we start to get inspired by something and move in a certain direction, then we start doing our research and taking action towards that (thing), and then we’re at a place where we start to feel confident and excited about what we’re doing … and guess what? of course at some point the cycle starts all over again ;) But you know what that means? It means that you’re getting to your next level, it means that you’ve been willing to put in the work for that chapter and maybe now it’s time for a new one. It’s part of the life experience we’re so lucky to have. So even if you’re not where you want to be, know that’s perfectly ok and now you may have better intel into where you are. Also a remember to meet yourself where you are with non-judgement and some gratitude for where you’re at. There’s always something to be appreciative for.
I distinctly remember driving home from work one day (at my last job) and sobbing crying praying to the Universe that I could get out of that situation. I was in a bad place, I was in a rut, and I didn’t think I was in control over the situation. I’ve spent 10 years in PD and couldn’t see a way out. Fast forward a few months from that point, and I was able to land a job with a company I really love. I was driving down that same road that I was crying on months prior and “walkin’ in the sun” by Rufus + Chaka Khan came on and it was validation that I was taking a step in the right direction. It says “Things have been going wrong for long enough to know, everything’s is right…. I been walking in the dark for long enough to know, I’ve finally seen the light…. Even a blind man can tell when he’s walking in the sun”. Meaning that it’s always worth having hope, and noticing the subtle signs from the Universe that you’re on the right path.
(2) Secondly, I’d love to encourage you to reconnect with dreams and goals that maybe you’ve put on the back burner because you weren’t sure it was a good idea or it wasn’t the right time or weren’t sure how to get there. You don’t have to make it overwhelming, you can start small by just getting a little inspo around whatever those dreams/goals are. Listen to podcasts, read books, look up YouTube videos to get reacquainted with what you love.
Life coaching was on my goal list since 2016, but it never really went past that. I wasn’t focused on it, so of course I didn’t put the time in the figure out what the steps would be. Once I turned 30 and was like damn ok you really can just wake up one day and be like where is life going?? I knew I was dedicated to put more intention around my life and creating an experience that was authentic and genuine for me. I took it slow and did a lot of research and saved money before I took my first major step towards becoming a life coach (i.e. enrolling at Lumia for training and certification). My research on what it would take to become certified as a coach? and what life as a coach would look? like helped me to discern if I was willing to put the time and energy into it. I totally recommend sifting through the short term and long term implications of going after your dreams, you may find it wasn’t what you thought it’d be or be inspired to take a different but similar route.
(3) Or if you aren’t even sure where you want to be…. EVEN BETTER. That’s right. We live in a society where you’re supposed to know exactly what you want to do and be as soon as your turn 18 (which is unrealistic imo). I know that finding your passion or living a life that feels authentic to YOU takes a lot of time, compassion towards yourself, self-exploration, and a willingness to get it wrong sometimes. To find which direction to move in think about your values and explore what feels exciting or simply… interesting… to you. What are you curious about? Think about what gets you fired up. What fascinates you? What are your values? What are you naturally good at? How could you help people (not in a volunteer sense, but in a how could you better someone’s daily life experience kind of way)? “What’s your passion?” can be such a loaded/scary/overwhelming question, and I’m still figuring it out is a great answer. Remember at the end of the day it’s your life that you’ll have to live and no one else’s.
I didn't really “find” my passion until late last year. And it wasn’t until I actually started doing it that I was validated that it was indeed my purpose and gave me a sense of joy and excitement. I’m also a firm believer that we’ll come across many different passions and ways of living in our individual journeys…realizing that helped me with the fear of commitment to choose 1 thing that was the end-all, be-all. Our “where we want to be” is ever-changing, just like we are.
(4) Figuring out what direction you want to move in is SUPER exciting and that’s usually when you feel all revved up to make changes and take action towards our dream life… however this can be when the real challenges arise and this is usually when folks abandon their dreams or lose faith in their abilities. I’m gonna be real - I thought that choosing a path was the hard part, but it turns out that staying on that path and making your way through the challenges that inevitably come up is actually the hardest part! BUT y’all know I’m a hoe for hope, so let’s chat about the ways through the common obstacles people face as they’re creating a life that’s exciting for them.
challenge #1: believing in yourself
This is a huge one. If you have limiting beliefs or negative self-talk towards yourself and your dreams, it’s going to be a lot easier to make excuses. Remind yourself that done is better than perfect. Think back to a time in your past when you were proud of yourself… you’ve done it before and you will do it again.
challenge #2: worrying about what others will think or comparing yourself to others
The reality is - most folks are too worried about themselves to be judging you. And even if they are… so what? SO WHAT? Who are they?! They aren’t you. Only you know what’s best for you. Take it one step at a time with expressing your dreams and you’ll soon realize no one is going to come at you commenting on what you’re doing. and if they are, tell them to fuck off. I say block people like that out of your life anyway, and if they aren’t that close to you then who cares?
Just a reminder that the only person you should compare yourself to is your previous self. You are a unique person on your unique journey and life experience. If we can turn our jealousy/comparison into curiosity and maybe take some insights on how they do things that can be helpful - but comparing yourself to someone else is like comparing a butterfly and a biscuit… Both amazing in their own right and provide their own value, but they’re 2 completely different things.
challenge #3: not showing up consistently for yourself
Are you having trouble sticking to your ****habits, rituals, or making time for your projects and goals in your schedule? Hone in on what your WHY? is. Why are you doing this? If you can’t answer that and feel energized by it, you may want to reconsider what you’ve chosen as your goals/dreams. Ideally, whatever you choose will become a top priority for you, so that you actually WANT to devote time to it. That way when challenges do come up, you’re eager and engaged with what you’re doing. As they say, where there’s a will there’s a way.
You know how people say “I could do that”? The reality is they probably could, but not everyone is willing to show up consistently to do it. The people that actually “do it” know that’s what sets them apart, and they show up for themselves a majority of the time, even when they don’t feel like it.
challenge #4: you downplay the significance of your goals and how badly you want them
I know a lot of us downplay ourselves, so I know it can be easy to brush your ideas and wishes off like they’re insignificant… but they aren't. They are important because they’re important to you. They mean something, and it could very well be the thing you end up doing that not only inspires other people like you but makes a positive ripple effect in society. So don’t you dare downplay how important your dreams are, that’s what they’re there for… to love and to care for since in my mind it’s a way to express yourself and your spirit. Sharing your dreams with a trusted loved one is a great way to start vocalizing and calling that dream into your life. I know it can be intimidating to share a fresh life direction with people, so just take it slow. As time goes on and the more action you take, and the more people you share it with… the more confident you’ll become.
challenge #5: you’re overwhelmed with what to do
BABY STEPS. If you have a task or project on your list and you keep pushing it out and pushing it out on your calendar, maybe you’ve bitten off more than you can chew. Just break it down into smaller steps, the smallest steps even. Every time you make a small action that is in alignment with your soul you are building a foundation of trust and confidence within yourself.
challenge #6: you make a mistake or something goes wrong
Shit happens. Especially if you’re leveling up! Like if you’re going after your dreams and aren’t doing something wrong… then I don’t believe you lol. To mess up and to learn from it means you are DOING SOMETHING. Now you know what doesn’t work, and you can move forward. Mistakes are valuable lessons, and on the other side of that is success (whatever that means for you). Sure you may feel frustrated or bummed, and it’s ok to feel that, but don’t let your limiting beliefs join the party because they will tell you to quit.
stick with it!
challenge #7: you’re putting in effort but feel like there’s no movement happening
You might even wonder if it’s worth putting your energy into if you’re not receiving any positive reinforcement, recognition, or validation. I promise you that if it’s something you truly believe in, you’re putting forth your best effort, and are doing so from a place of genuine love and care…. it is worth it. It is 1000x worth it. If you can be patient, I can assure you that you’ll be rewarded. The moment you’re just grateful for where you are and can be proud of the work you’re putting in… and suddenly, you’ll start to receive new exciting opportunities, people will recognize a change in you, and you’ll feel proud and sure of where you’re at and where you’re headed.
Peppy’s tarot of the week
This week… we got a good one y’all… 6 of swords! This dude is in a boat with his boo, navigating the rough seas, and they have 6 swords standing upright at the front of the boat. This card means transition, change, rite of passage, releasing baggage.
(FROM BIDDY TAROT linked above) The Six of Swords shows that you are in a state of transition, leaving behind what was familiar and moving towards the unknown. You might be moving house, leaving a relationship, changing jobs, going through a rite of passage or a mental shift. This change may be your own doing or forced upon you, and you may feel sad to leave behind what is so familiar to you. However, you know this move is essential for your growth and personal development. The sadness over what you have lost (or released) will soon be replaced by greater mental clarity and a renewed acceptance of change. You will become a better person as a result. The Six of Swords invites you to let go of whatever is holding you back, be it from your past or your present circumstances. Instead gaze ahead to your future and choose the way most in alignment with your Highest Good and long-term potential. You will need to make tough decisions and compromises along the way; see it as a rite of passage. You are headed towards a much better position in life, so long as you are willing to evolve and shed whatever you no longer need. Do not dwell on what gets left behind. Instead, use this as an opportunity for changing your beliefs about yourself, moving away from whom you used to be and towards whom you want to be.
Pep you are so talented, thank you bud!
Announcements + Plugs
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Make sure you sign up for a FREE session by end of January
Listen to the podcast episode (24: Are you where you want to be?)
The Year Project at Continnuum Art in Hendersonville on Sunday Jan 29 4-7pm ($26 for a ticket)
Hosted by The Beauty Boost Asheville, The Year Project is an evening to Cultivate, Manifest & Connect with other women on your goals for 2023!
I am excited to speak on Manifesting A Life You’re Passionate About. I’ll chat through mindset, consistency and breaking a big goal down into actionable steps. There will also be an embodiment practice to start the night off with Amy Natalie, who will also speak about morning rituals and spiritual practices. Then Ash Henry will guide us through overcoming challenges in pursuit of our goals.
The rest of the evening is going is more hands-on where we will create vision boards, have light bites + bevvies, creating connections, and experience stations!
Invite your best gals and get your tickets here!
Location: CONTINUUM ART 147c 1st Avenue East Hendersonville, NC 28792
